Squirrels Are a Part of Our Morning Routine

Every.dang.morning.

A typical school morning for us includes repetition. Lots of repetition. Everything gets repeated so many times, I sometimes feel as though I'm beating my head against a wall. We also have a lot of "squirrels."

6:30 a.m. is wake up time. Monday-Friday, 6:30 a.m. is a ridiculous time to wake up, obviously. On Saturday and Sunday, we've already beaten every level of Disney Infinity and started building a new world in Minecraft by 6:30 a.m. 

"I have to get on the Wii before my sister wakes up and takes over Netflix!" 

Saturday and Sunday, 5 a.m. is a perfectly reasonable time to wake up. Obviously.

On school mornings, by 7 a.m. clothes should be on and breakfast eaten. All I can say to this is, Thank Goodness for School Uniforms, okay? Really. School uniforms kind of makes it easier for him to pick up his shorts from yesterday to wear again today because I forgot to throw them in the wash last night...or I couldn't find them.

It's at this point things get a bit crazy. While I'm busy making the kids a healthy, whole foods lunch (okay, some days they get goldfish, a banana and a sugar/cinnamon "burrito" - don't judge) it becomes a free-for-all.

I have to be sure he and his sister never go into the bathroom at the same time. Or anywhere out of sight/ear shot together, to be honest. They bug the mess out of each other and fights derail my whole morning! So here's where the fun starts:

Me: "Little dude, go get your shoes."

10 minutes later he wonders back into the kitchen, no shoes. And now his shorts are off. Wait. What?

Me: "Hey! Where are your pants?! Where are your shoes?"

Him: "Oh! Oops!" Runs out of room.

At this point, my elevenager comes into the kitchen with her shoes in hand, hair a mess, groggy, scowly face on. Elevenagers are fun, y'all. She'll start complaining about her brother and how he'll make them late again. And since they just finished serving their detention sentence for too many tardies, I can understand her frustration.

Here comes my son. Pants around his ankles. "Okay. put them on! Where are your shoes?"

He turns to go get his shoes, with pants around his ankles. "PUT YOUR PANTS ON!"

Finally. Pants AND shoes are on. Sort of. "Shoes all the way on, please."

"Brush your teeth."

He stands there, staring at a piece of paper on the table. "Hey, bud, go brush your teeth."

Stands there.

I get right next to him, "Go brush your teeth."

He runs out of the room. 10 minutes later he wonders back in the room with Emmett from the Lego Movie in one hand and a handful of Legos in another. Oh, dear.

"Are your teeth brushed?"

"Well, no because Emmett..."

"No. Just no. Go brush your teeth. We have to go or we'll be late. You don't want stinky breath at school do you? Do you want detention again?"

After I get the kids to school, I feel like I need a nap. Some things that have helped is the constant routine. Every morning, everything is in the same order. When he knows what to expect and what comes next, it seems easier just to get it done.

Also, I bribe him. If he is 100% ready to go before it's time to leave, he gets to play on his tablet on the way to school. I used to have a no electronics rule in the morning, but it did more harm than good.

You know what though? Our "squirrel" moments can lead to some pretty great stuff, too. Like having a completely random conversation about weird games the kids play on the playground. Or why we need a couch like the one Emmett built in the Lego Movie. And sometimes, there's even random singing and dancing.

Yeah, sometimes I love squirrels in the morning.