I was 22 when I got married and had my first child: a beautiful baby girl whose very existence in this world has made it that much better.
Three years later, we decided to have another child. And so, my son came into our lives at full force. I suppose I could say he was strong-willed from that first breath he took outside my womb. You can hear the neonatal specialist saying on the video that our son was pushing out all the mucus and gunk on his own with his big, strong breaths.
My daughter was always a gentle baby. She always smiled and laughed and she slept anywhere and everywhere. She was so easy to please and she was the love of my life. I miss now the bond we had in her infancy as those tween hormones take over her 11-year-old body now (ha ha).
My son was never a gentle baby. He was never easy. And he never slept. His little quirks took over our lives. Our pediatrician warned us not to let it control the house, but when Little Dude would finally fall asleep, we turned down the T.V. and all held our breaths.
He was always overstimulated. Always seemed bothered to be held. He pushed away from me, even as a tiny baby when I would try to comfort him. He refused to nurse. He rarely slept and when he did it was in 20-30 minute increments. I was exhausted and a wreck as I never could find any sort of rhythm between him and his sister.
There were precious moments too, don't get me wrong, and I loved him with all my might. Some things he outgrew, like not wanting to be held. And even though at one point his doctor worried about his lack of growth and placed him on iron supplements and multivitamins, he did begin to eat and gain weight.
He sleeps now, but after a year of several wake ups during the night followed by years of night terrors. If your child has never had a night terror, bless you. It's terrifying when he gets out of bed, screaming and screaming and running through the house and there's nothing you can do. One night, it was so bad, we checked his entire room for a scorpion, thinking one might have stung him as he slept. (There was no scorpion.)
I was reassured many times that he was just going through a "phase" and everything was fine. I look back now and think perhaps I should have pushed harder for answers and help.
What I know now is that according to some studies, everything Little Dude exhibited as a baby were possible signs of ADHD. I say possible because not all babies who exhibit behaviors such as sleep problems, eating problems, or crying a lot will later be diagnosed with ADHD.
The way I describe it to people who say, "well, that's just normal toddler behavior [the tantrums]" or "he's just being a kid," or "that doesn't seem abnormal to me," is, first of all, we don't measure "normal" and "abnormal" in our home. We're all a little weird here. Second, the best way I can describe is, "If you have this symptom here, and that symptom over there, separately they don't sound like a big deal. But when you throw them all in one basket, and look at them as connected one to the other, it kind of changes things a bit."
Note: I am not an expert. I am not a doctor or psychologist. I am just a mother sharing her research, perspective, and journey along this ADHD path.
Three years later, we decided to have another child. And so, my son came into our lives at full force. I suppose I could say he was strong-willed from that first breath he took outside my womb. You can hear the neonatal specialist saying on the video that our son was pushing out all the mucus and gunk on his own with his big, strong breaths.
My daughter was always a gentle baby. She always smiled and laughed and she slept anywhere and everywhere. She was so easy to please and she was the love of my life. I miss now the bond we had in her infancy as those tween hormones take over her 11-year-old body now (ha ha).
My son was never a gentle baby. He was never easy. And he never slept. His little quirks took over our lives. Our pediatrician warned us not to let it control the house, but when Little Dude would finally fall asleep, we turned down the T.V. and all held our breaths.
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| We have a screamer! A beautiful one! |
There were precious moments too, don't get me wrong, and I loved him with all my might. Some things he outgrew, like not wanting to be held. And even though at one point his doctor worried about his lack of growth and placed him on iron supplements and multivitamins, he did begin to eat and gain weight.
He sleeps now, but after a year of several wake ups during the night followed by years of night terrors. If your child has never had a night terror, bless you. It's terrifying when he gets out of bed, screaming and screaming and running through the house and there's nothing you can do. One night, it was so bad, we checked his entire room for a scorpion, thinking one might have stung him as he slept. (There was no scorpion.)
I was reassured many times that he was just going through a "phase" and everything was fine. I look back now and think perhaps I should have pushed harder for answers and help.
What I know now is that according to some studies, everything Little Dude exhibited as a baby were possible signs of ADHD. I say possible because not all babies who exhibit behaviors such as sleep problems, eating problems, or crying a lot will later be diagnosed with ADHD.
The way I describe it to people who say, "well, that's just normal toddler behavior [the tantrums]" or "he's just being a kid," or "that doesn't seem abnormal to me," is, first of all, we don't measure "normal" and "abnormal" in our home. We're all a little weird here. Second, the best way I can describe is, "If you have this symptom here, and that symptom over there, separately they don't sound like a big deal. But when you throw them all in one basket, and look at them as connected one to the other, it kind of changes things a bit."
Note: I am not an expert. I am not a doctor or psychologist. I am just a mother sharing her research, perspective, and journey along this ADHD path.
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